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Frequently Asked Questions

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What is Barely Dating?

Barely Dating is the newest in online matchmaking where you can see all of your potential date — both conventional dating profile and nude photos — before you decide to meet in person.  And it's free!

If we are honest with ourselves, most of us will admit that we are interested in knowing what our date will look like when the wrapping comes off and things move to the next level.  Right?

So why date the wrong people?  Why waste time?  Why have awkward moments where anticipation turns to antipathy?  Why not get it right first time by only dating people who match your preferences in every way?  Why not find someone who likes you the way you are?

No more guessing... just the bare, naked truth!

Why does it exist?

Barely Dating is the place where you can anonymously show what you've got, and match with someone who has what you want!

Do you dislike body hair or tattoos?  Do you like pierced nipples?  Women with large areolas, saggy breasts, or small pointy breasts?  Men with a hairy chest, firm butt and medium-length, uncircumcised, thick penis?  Do you prefer partners who are shaved down below or 'natural'?  Do you want to know in advance if they have a skin condition, stretch marks, scars, sores, or excess fat?

If a man asks a woman he just met about her areolas or labia, it's likely to be the last question he ever asks her.  He's a creep, he's weird, he's a pervert... but he still has his preferences.

Similarly, a woman who is embarrassed about her long, imbalanced labia can't advertise that fact but secretly yearns to meet a guy who will adore them rather than suggest labiaplasty.

It's awkward and risky to bring up these topics with a stranger you've just met — they might end your relationship before it begins!

Here at you can find exactly what you're looking for, without feeling awkward or wasting time on unsuitable dates.

How much does it cost?

Absolutely nothing!

Our revenue comes from discreet advertising.  In future we will be offering paid membership which will open up premium features such as being able to click on any photo you see and contact that person, or search profiles by keywords.

NOTE: Our first 50,000 members will have access to everything, including premium features, for life.  So sign up now!

How does it work?

The concept is very simple.

  1. Sign up by providing basic details
  2. Upload some photos, preferably nude and non-nude
  3. Start rating (swiping) nude and non-nude photos
  4. Users who like each other are automatically matched
  5. You can contact matches and reveal (or hide) photos

And that's it!  You only reveal what you want to.

👉 Example 1:  After matching with someone, you reveal your non-nude photos only.  Your match can see your dating profile just like on an ordinary dating site, but not your nude photos.  However, they did also rate your nude photos anonymously, not knowing that they belong to you: all they know is that they will really like you – both dressed and undressed!

👉 Example 2:  You have matched with someone, but he/she only reveals their nude photos so you can't see their face and who they are.  Because you rated them highly, you can be sure that you will also like their outward appearance when you meet!

Me? Nude? Online? No way!

We at Barely Dating felt exactly the same way, believe it or not!  That is why we developed a system of anonymous nudity ("Anonudity") so secure that all of our staff have nude photosets on this website.  Try to find us!

  • Non-nude photos and nude photos are stored in separate databases
  • User IDs and photo IDs are encrypted throughout the system
  • Nude photos cannot show faces or distinguishing features
  • Photos are rated (swiped) anonymously, randomly, and separately
  • Only you decide whether you want to show someone your photos

👉 When you match with someone, you can be sure that you will like what you see in person — even if they don't reveal their photos!

Do I have to upload nudes?

No, you can start matching even if you only upload 'family friendly' photos.

Uploading both non-nude and nude photos has several benefits:

  • You will get more matches
  • Your matches will probably be more interested in you
  • That's what Barely Dating is all about!

However, with that being said, each person in a relationship brings something to the table – be it beauty, status, personality, location, etc.

In other words, you might not have any nude photos that you are proud of... but you might own a yacht!  Similarly, someone else with the type of body you can only dream of might be seeking a better life... and it's a match!

Can I upload only nudes?


The main drawback is that you will not match with anyone who only wants Quality Matches, not even if they rate your nude(s) WOW!

We humans have evolved to assess our compatibility with others quite accurately based on their face.  By assessing someone purely on their body parts we are much more likely to meet someone incompatible.

When you upload only nudes, you will match with others seeking Quantity Matches who like your **** (insert body feature).  Later, when you send a profile photo or meet in person, they may be disappointed!

How many photos do I need?

We recommend uploading at least two non-nude and two nude photos to maximize matches.  You can upload as many photos as you wish.

Here is what having different numbers of photos means for you:

  • None: You can't start matching yet!
  • 1 (nude or non-nude): You can match with someone who swipes "WOW!" and is using 'Quantity Mode' (see below)
  • 1 nude, 1 non-nude: You can match with someone who swipes "WOW!"
  • 2+ (all nude or all non-nude): You can match with anyone who is using 'Quantity Mode' (see below)
  • 2+ of one, 1 of the other: You can match with anyone using 'Quantity Mode', or 'Quality Mode' if they rate the 1 photo "WOW!"
  • 2+ nude, 2+ non-nude: You can match with anyone

NOTE: During matching your photos are shown randomly, spaced out, and mixed with thousands of other photos.  No one will ever see your nude or non-nude photos together, or make the connection between them, unless you allow them to.

Matches: Quality vs. Quantity

Barely Dating is designed around the concept of matching with people based on nude and non-nude photos.  However, some users choose not to upload both types of photo.

For this reason you can select either Quality or Quantity mode in your Match Settings.

Quality Mode: You only match with those who have high-scoring nude and non-nude photos.  If their nude or non-nude photos receive a low score, or they don't exist, then you will not match with them.  This means you will receive fewer matches, but better matches.

👉 Choose Quality Mode if:

  • you are receiving too many matches
  • finding an attractive and sexy partner is your top priority
  • your ideal match (e.g. younger) is more likely to upload nudes

Quantity Mode: You will match with those who have high-scoring nude or non-nude photos (or both), and no low-scoring photos.  This means you will receive more matches... but they may be hiding something!

👉 Choose Quantity Mode if:

  • you want a greater choice
  • you are not receiving enough matches
  • attractiveness is not the only factor in your decision
  • your ideal match (e.g. older, wealthier) is less likely to upload nudes

Why am I getting few matches?

The number of matches you get depends on several factors, most of which you have control over:

  1. Wait at least a couple of days
    Give yourself and others time to match
  2. Swipe plenty of photos
  3. Upload profile AND nude photos
    Users who want Quality Matches won't match with you if you only have one type of photo
  4. View X-rated photos
    Some users show mainly (or only) X-rated photos.  If you don't rate those, your chances of matching are lower.
  5. Select 'Quantity Mode' for matching
    This lets you match based on someone having great profile or nude photos, not necessarily both
  6. Relax your match criteria
    Being too specific with your requirements will mean fewer people match them
  7. Ignore some of their match criteria
    Your age, height, education and financials will be ignored while matching
  8. Last but not least, other people need to find you attractive!  We can all look good in a photo, so carefully select the best ones.

What photos are acceptable?

Short answer: Anything that is legal and shows only you.  Long answer:

You must be over 18, of course, not engaged in violent or illegal behavior, and the photos must be of yourself (or yourselves if couple).

Photos that are of poor quality, not of yourself, improperly cropped, wrong gender, wrong age group, duplicates, and so on, will be rejected with a reason you can see.

Nude photos cannot include your face.  Sex acts, arousal, close-ups and other 'porn' is permitted so long as it conforms to the above.

In technical terms the minimum height or width for a photo is 250 pixels and photos more than 800 pixels in height or width will be scaled down.  The aspect ratio is limited to 2 : 1 with cropping on both ends to achieve this ratio if necessary.

Which photos get most interest?

Good quality, captivating photos are essential for being rated highly and getting more matches.

Your overall score is based on your non-nude and nude photo scores.  If you only have one category of photo, that is fine but you can only match with someone using Quantity Mode (they don't need to see both categories of photo).

Those using Quality Mode can only match with you if you have uploaded both non-nude and nude photos.

Non-nude (profile) photos
Smiling, looking natural, and having an interesting backdrop all improve a photo's scores.  Having an angry/silly/unnatural pose, or obscuring your face, will result in lower scores.

Make sure the photo contains only you, or that it is clear which person is you.

Nude photos
You can upload tasteful nudes and/or X-rated photos (close-ups, arousal, sexual activity).  Uploading only a close-up photo of your private parts (X-rated) will probably not get you a match.  We recommend including photos that show larger areas of your body.

Note about X-rated photos
Users can choose not to see X-rated photos.  In that case they will only be scoring you on your tasteful nudes.  Without any tasteful nudes, your nude photos might not get a score at all!

Advice for men
While you might think women enjoy 'dick pics', try to imagine swiping on 500 close-up penis photos.  If you ask women, many/most are not impressed by them and would rather see your broad shoulders, overall body tone, thighs, butt, etc. — in other words, photos that include more of your body.

What is 'Tit4tat'?

Tit4tat allows two users to enter into an "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" agreement.

For example, if you are shy but would be willing to reveal your nudes if the other person does too, then you can make or accept a Tit4tat Offer.

After entering into a Tit4tat agreement, whatever you reveal to your match (profile and/or nudes) will automatically be revealed by them also.

NOTE: You cannot revoke/cancel a Tit4tat agreement or block the other person until they have seen as much as you have seen.  That would be an 'unfair revoke'.

There is one exception.  You are allowed 2 'unfair revokes', to be used in emergency situations only.  For example, if you mutually agree to reveal your photos and you see to your horror that the other person is a work colleague or family member, you can revoke Tit4tat even if that other person has not yet seen your photos.

Once you have used up all of your 'unfair revokes', you will not be able to do so again unless the other person is misbehaving and you report them.  But beware – any false report against another user will result in you receiving the penalty that they would have received, which may include being banned!

How do I rate people?

We use the classic 'swipe right for like' system, with some additional features.

  • Swipe RIGHT for "like"
  • Swipe LEFT for "dislike"
  • Swipe UP for "WOW!"
  • Swipe DOWN for "EWW!"
  • Tap or click SKIP for no score at all

NOTE: A "WOW!" (swipe up) is worth a lot more than a "like" and virtually guarantees a match from your end, although of course the other person may not like you.  Similarly, an "EWW!" (swipe down) will normally completely rule out a person and mean you won't be shown any more of their photos.

Because they are so powerful, "WOW!"s are limited, but you earn more as you continue to swipe.  Similarly, "like"s are somewhat limited: You cannot swipe "like" for every photo in a desperate attempt to get a date!

Made a mistake?  Changed your mind?  It's easy to undo and redo up to your last 50 swipes.

I have very specific requirements!

We all have certain criteria when it comes to a partner, for example their age, number of children, or drinking habit.  In these times, many are seeking unvaccinated dating (or vaccinated), or don't wish to meet those of a particular political persuasion.

Barely Dating offers more choices and, we believe, more useful choices than most other dating sites.  You can narrow down your search by:

  • Gender/sexual preferences
  • Age range
  • Height range
  • Body type (Skinny/Normal/Overweight)
  • Location
  • Number of children
  • Wanting (more) children
  • Education level
  • Financial status
  • Smoking habit
  • Drinking habit
  • Diet
  • COVID-19 vaccination status
  • Political leaning (Left/Right/Independent)

Because each additional requirement reduces your possible matches, we recommend only specifying those that are really important to you.

What gets me banned?

In order to maintain the integrity of our system and provide a pleasant environment for our users, we reserve the right to ban anyone at any time.  We don't want to, but sometimes we have to!

If someone reports you for improper behavior and we decide that it is a valid report, then you will receive a penalty score.  Once this score reaches a certain level, you will be banned.

Certain offenses – such as "being rude" – carry a low penalty score whereas others – such as death threats or blackmail – carry a high penalty score that will result in an immediate ban.

If you make a frivolous/false report about someone, then you will receive the penalty that they would have received.  For example, if you falsely accuse someone of making death threats, then you (not they) will be banned.

Many dating sites are plagued by transgendered individuals pretending to be biological females (or males).  This degrades the experience of other users, as well as wasting their time and possibly causing embarrassment: If you are transgender and do not select that as your sexuality, then you will be permanently banned.

Similarly, if you upload fake photos, and our reverse image search technology detects this or you are reported, then you will be permanently banned.

Can I see how others rate me?

Yes, you can use to determine if others think you are "hot or not", clothed and/or nude.

Each of your photos will receive an individual score out of 10 that is computed based on every swipe that anyone has ever made on it – in other words, how others rate it on average.

This will help you decide which photos to keep, which ones to remove, and which types of photo to add.

When managing your photos, you will receive a warning if any of your photos are scoring particularly poorly.  We recommend that you remove these photos as soon as possible in order to increase your matches; if you do not, then the system will automatically remove very low-scoring photos in order to maintain a good 'swiping experience' for other users.

Scams, ads, fakes & underage

We strive to maintain a scam-free, fake-free, safe and legal service not just for our users' benefit but also for our own reputation.

Scams are not tolerated and offenders will be shut down immediately.

Advertising of mutually-agreed off-site services based on informed consent is allowed so long as it relates to you personally and not, for example, real estate.  Be aware, however, that a certain level of complaints can result in a ban.

Fake profiles, as either reported by other users or detected using various methods, are either deleted immediately or given a chance to verify their identity.

We do not tolerate using other people's photos or pretending to be someone or something else.  Any user can be reported, including for harmful off-site activity or deception, and once a threshold is reached that user is permanently banned.  Serious offences such as death threats result in immediate bans.

We do not perform verification for several reasons:

  • It is an unnecessarily tedious process for all involved
  • Uploaded verification can be photoshopped or deepfaked
  • After meeting in person, users can report each other for not being who they say they are
  • Those submitting nude photos under a false name cannot be expected to also submit identifying information

Those suspected of being underage will be asked to submit their government-issued photo ID before their photos are approved.

Unlike (apparently) many dating sites, we do care about our reputation and are embarrassed by anything that diminishes our users' experiences or trust.  Please report anything you are unhappy with and we will endeavor to rectify it immediately.

Deleting or pausing your account

Your account can exist in three states:

  • Active: You have full use of your account; others can match, see, and message you.
  • Paused: You cannot use your account; others cannot match, see, or message you.
  • Deleted: Your account is marked for deletion.  It is the same as 'Paused', except that your account will be permanently deleted 24 hours after your last activity.  To cancel deletion, simply log in again within 24 hours and set your account status to 'Active' or 'Paused'.

After logging in, go to Settings » Account Settings » Pause or delete account to change your account status.

More questions?

If you have any questions not answered here, contact us and receive a clear response from a real person within hours.

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